Johnny Haronian, a Los Angeles resident working in real estate and construction, shares his profound experiences with psychedelics, particularly mushrooms, over the past year. Struggling with being overweight and the loss of family members, Johnny found mushrooms to be life-changing. Encouraged by his brother, he discovered that psychedelics motivated him to lead a healthier lifestyle and connect better with his emotions. Despite facing a frightening trip, he believes that even bad experiences can be beneficial. Johnny advocates for the benefits of psychedelics, especially in addressing modern mental health issues, and expresses hope for their future legalization.
it’s given me the motivation to be healthy and exercise -Johnny
Watch: Can Mushrooms Help You Lose Weight? Johnny’s Inspirational Story
How did you first find psilocibin mushrooms?
My name is Johnny Haronian. I live in Los Angeles. I work in real estate and construction. I’m newly into psychedelics Within this past year, I would say it’s really saved my life in, many ways, specifically mushrooms. I haven’t experienced the other psychedelics yet.
but I’ve experienced death in my family, and I’ve tried so many different things, like different therapy, and I’ve went through different addictions, alcohol and other drugs. Finally, I, gave mushrooms a try. After years, my brother, pushing me to try it, I finally took it just to shut him up.
I’m glad he pushed me as much as he did, because my life has gotten better, used to be extremely overweight. Not anymore. it’s given me the motivation to be healthy and exercise. when, you’re overweight and you’re on a trip, like it punishes you, like you want to feel good.
In what other ways has psilocibin helped you in your life?
I’m extremely health conscious. I don’t drink a sip of alcohol since this journey, so I don’t put anything in my body that’s, that is not safe. It’s made me a lot more vulnerable. Being able to connect with my emotions a lot better.
So yeah, my relationships are better. I experienced microdosing a little bit, even a microdose where you don’t even feel it like a trip, it’s just like a natural mood enhancer. Better than any of these prescriptions that we’ve all been prescribed by his doctors.
On the stigma around psychedelics
I think there’s some things that you won’t know until you try it. You can’t explain what a color is to a blind person. The best things in life. Are, some of these things that you have to just take a leap of faith and you won’t know till you try it. With all the mental health problems that we have in today’s world.
It’s I think it’s not just important It’s like it should it needs to be the priority. There’s so many people that are hurting and are messed up in the head and They, they just, they need this. And it’s just so sad to me that it’s just looks so down upon. I just know how many people could help. I know how it’s helped me.
And I’m so thankful that I had the opportunity to try it. I don’t know when psychedelics will be legal. If it’s 10 years from now, that’s 10 more years of pain that people are going through. It’s sad, but I’m optimistic for the future
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Full Interview with Nate Ostrowski at the bottom of the page
Nathan Ostrowski, a Navy veteran from Tucson and founder of Music With a Purpose Tucson, shares his journey from addiction to recovery and purpose.
For 35 years, he lived in “chaos” without direction, using alcohol and drugs to avoid his issues. During COVID, his fentanyl addiction led to two suicide attempts. After surviving, he committed to change and entered detox.
Watch: Navy Veteran’s Journey with 5-MEO-DMT – Fentanyl, Grieving Loss, & Finding Purpose
For me, once I found that self love, I found my purpose. I couldn’t be more thankful for the Seri tribe and for Mexico. -Nate
Read: How Bufo Alvarius Helped Me Beat Fentanyl Addiction and Create ‘Music With Purpose’
Two months into recovery, Nathan met Michael at a drum circle, leading to his introduction to Bufo (5-MeO-DMT from the Sonoran Desert toad). In Mexico, he had a transformative experience he describes as a “baptismal rebirth,” helping him find peace and self-love. When his sister later died from fentanyl, he turned to medicine again rather than relapsing, processing his grief in just five days.
“The natural DMT. That’s where it is. That’s where you can tap into yourself and who you are and have a different understanding of why we’re here.”
These experiences transformed Nathan from a self-described selfish person to someone dedicated to helping others. He founded Music With a Purpose Tucson, which hosts reggae concerts to fund healing experiences for veterans in Mexico with the Seri tribe. So far, they’ve sent four veterans. Nathan believes people shouldn’t wait for the “right headspace” to seek help, as waiting keeps them trapped. He sees reggae music as inherently healing and unifying, using it to create healing opportunities for others.
Q&A With Nate
How did your addiction escalate to fentanyl and what happened as a result?
When COVID happened, I hit a real rough point, still struggling with addiction and, just let the struggle get the best of me. My addiction led to, you know, me doing fentanyl and getting hooked on that, and that started a real big spiral downhill. I was looking for that one that would just take all my problems away. And in that spiral, the final straw was just, miserable with my life stuck in that cycle and the lowest of lows. So, I tried to take the easy way out and take a bunch and not wake up and, tried it twice. And it’s funny cause every morning I woke up the next morning I was pissed. It was like, damn, it didn’t work.
What was your experience trying Bufo (5-MeO-DMT) for the first time?
Two months into my recovery, I was introduced to Bufo. I put it off for a long time. I kept using life excuses to try to hinder me from what the real work I needed to do. This is one of those things where Mike showed up at the park and said, ‘Hey, we’re going to go do this.’ And I said, ‘Oh shit. Are we? I’m not ready,’ but when are we ever ready? So I’m thankful we went to a park, middle and just a big open field.
I could just imagine if people were looking at us, what they were seeing, like, what are those guys doing? And instantly I knew it’s what I needed. So three weeks later, I was down in Mexico. And that was the life changing moment for me. My most profound experience was on Sunday. We went across to their island and a shark island. And my Sunday ceremony was floating in the ocean. It was one of the most beautiful, unexplainable experiences, but the best way I’d describe it is it was my baptismal rebirth. It was a cleansing of everything that I was running from, and when everything was said and done, I felt peace and I felt self love.
What is Music With a Purpose Tucson and how did it start?
I knew this changed my life. And I talked about previously being selfish. One thing I learned is selfish doesn’t get you anything. Being selfless is more rewarding. And I knew this changed my life. So I’m like, how can I create an opportunity to help other people get this experience? So I’ve always been big into music. I love reggae music. So that’s where the concept of music with the purpose of Tucson came into play. The whole vision is to provide a space where the community at Tucson can come together to help a veteran.
Why do you focus specifically on reggae music for your events?
For me, I’m a reggae guy. For me, reggae brings all walks of life together. That’s one of the beautiful things I get feedback from. You know, at a reggae show I got everything from those hippies to motorcycles to motorcycle clubs. It brings a wide variety and reggae music is about unity. And for me personally, I don’t, there’s not a lot of genres that have that unity. So that’s why I love reggae. Reggae saved my life.
Watch the full interview with Nate Ostrowksi
https://vimeo.com/1061655840?share=copy
About Normalize Psychedelics
Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit 501(c)(3) working to transform public perception of psychedelic medicine through real stories of healing. Our mission is to collect 1,000 powerful testimonials from individuals whose lives have been transformed by psychedelic experiences. By sharing these authentic voices, we aim to reduce stigma, advance the conversation around mental health, and expand our understanding of wellness.
Your donation will help us amplify these important stories and create lasting change. Every contribution, whether $5 or $500, directly supports our work to document and share these transformative experiences. As a registered 501(c)(3), all donations are tax-deductible. Join us in building a future where psychedelic healing is better understood and accepted
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Gringo, a 53-year-old Navy veteran, shares his transformative journey with psychedelics, particularly Bufo and ayahuasca, which helped him overcome years of depression, alcoholism, and suicidal tendencies. Introduced to psychedelics by his motorcycle club president, Gringo describes the profound impact of these substances in addressing his mental health challenges. He emphasizes the importance of community support and encourages others struggling with similar issues to explore alternative healing methods. Through his experiences, Gringo champions the potential benefits of psychedelics despite societal skepticism.
What was life like before psychedelics?
My name is Gringo. I’m a 20 year Navy vet. while I was in the Navy, I served on a nuclear powered submarines, retired in 2009. after I retired in 2009, I went into the federal government until I was medically retired two years ago.
I was meant to retire because of a, botched neck surgery and it gave me a little bit of a C5 palsy and I’ve lost a lot of, strength in my, arm right here. So I am no longer, working anymore. Before psychedelics, I lived in a dark place. It was, I was very, dark. It was, I alienated myself from people.
I drank a lot. I self medicated. I would look in the mirror. I didn’t like what I saw. I ended up drinking myself till I liked what I saw. And then when I liked what I saw, I had drank too much. By the time the rest of it caught up, I was pissed off that I was going through this.
I had a lot of suicidal ideations.
I was ready to check out.
How did you find psychedelics?
I found psychedelics through the president of our motorcycle club. He came down to Mexico, down in Cabo one time and he did some ayahuasca. he kept trying to sell it to me, but after you’ve been through the, the mental health program and the VA, it’s hard to think anything helps.
But he convinced me and I went down to Hermosillo and we did, it was an awakening. It wasn’t stuff that I wanted to see, but it was stuff that I needed to see. It changed because it made me aware. I was really scared afterwards. I did a lot of crying. Crying probably about a week every day. I didn’t know how to process it very well because there was a lot of stuff that I couldn’t run from.
I couldn’t run from once I was under the medicine. I couldn’t run from it and it brought to light where my issues were and I’ve never seen anything like that. It left me scared. It left me happy. It’s just, it was just a weird feeling.
How were you able to process difficult emotions?
The family I come from, it’s hard to talk about your problems because we’re under the, we’re under the thought that if you don’t talk about it, you don’t exist and you hide a lot of things. so it was really hard to talk to people, but the guys, my motorcycle club who did it with me, Chris, who has also been interviewed and my president chaos, we all went through it together.
So it was very easy. for me to talk to them because we have all experienced it. It was, it’s not like talking to some doctor or somebody on the street where nobody knows your experience. But the guys who were there with me and we went through it, it was easy for me to ask questions and do the experience with them and have them help me guide me through.
I think the community is very important because people are going through things for different reasons, but you always need support. And one thing that I found in this community is the support everybody, even if you’ve never met somebody and you go through a ceremony, when you come back, it’s like, they’re part of the family, the connection is there.
And it’s somebody who you can express yourself to, and you can talk to, and the stuff that you couldn’t talk to people before you could talk to them because you’ve experienced the connection. You’ve got the connection, you got the bond.
Speak on the stigma surrounding psychedelics
People talk what they don’t understand. You got a lot of people who are the old guard, and they don’t want to believe in this, but this medicine’s been around for thousands of years. It’s not like it just came out of a pharmacy. this has been around. People have used it. Native Americans, Native people to whatever country they’re from, they have their own brand of medicine, spiritual medicine.
People need to try it before they say anything or they make judgment. A lot of people, if you remember last year, they made fun of Aaron Rogers for doing his ayahuasca ceremony. And people were talking around it’s a joke.
And I knew exactly what he was doing, and people want to get run in their mouth and they don’t know what to do. So I was very encouraged by that. We need more people to speak up just to the naysayers because there’s a lot of people who do this medicine.
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Chris Leisinger, a retired army vet and former scout sniper, shares his profound journey of healing from PTSD with the help of psychedelics after 12 years of service and three tours in Iraq. He explains how traditional medications from the VA left him emotionally numb and suicidal until an encounter with psychedelics, facilitated by his motorcycle club, changed his life. Psychedelics helped veteran ditch 16 medications and Chris is here to share his story.
We signed up to defend our country writing a check to include our life. And the VA they just want to throw pharmaceutical meds at you and it makes you emotionally numb.
-Chris
Summary
Chris now collaborates with Mike Manion and Healing Frontline Warriors, helping other veterans through ceremonies in Mexico where they provide free psychedelic treatments. Chris describes personal experiences and transformations and emphasizes the importance of reaching out for help, underscoring that it’s okay not to be okay.
Watch: How Psychedelics Helped a Veteran STOP Depending On Pills
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFK2h3PeIT0
What condition were you in after leaving the military?
My name is Chris Leisinger. I’m a retired army vet of 12 years. I was a scout sniper for those 12 years. I did 3.5 years in Iraq. 16 different psych meds from the VA, as a matter of fact. 6 of them were to treat the PTSD. The other 10 were to treat the side effects of that.
I was on 16 different psych meds from the VA. 6 of them were to treat the PTSD. The other 10 were to treat the side effects of that.
Life before psychedelics was rough. I was emotionally numb. I didn’t care about anything. I actually tried to kill myself once. And my 230 pound Mastiff Repo stopped me from doing it. And when I say stop me, I had the gun in my lap. He picked it up, carried it to the back fence, dropped it in the dirt, and then sat on it.
And then when I reached to grab it, he growled and snapped at me and then coward like I was going to beat him. That was my big, aha, wake up moment through my motorcycle club, Roland Locos. That’s what got me into the psychedelics. And it changed my life. It helped rewire my brain. So that I’m off all the meds.
I can actually enjoy life again. I’m not angry. I’m actually probably one of the calmest individuals there is. It used to, I didn’t go to Walmart unless it was like three or four in the morning. Cause if you bumped into me, I’m ripping your head off because I was just so uneasy. I was so agitated, so angry.
How many ceremonies have you been a part of?
I’ve done 16 to 20 different ceremonies to the point now. I can actually help facilitate and help other people. I can dive into people’s psyche and help them clear the cobwebs. Or as I like to say, wake up from the matrix.
I’ve done mushrooms, I’ve done ayahuasca, I’ve done bufo, which is from the Sonoran Desert Toad.
I’ve done mushrooms, I’ve done ayahuasca, I’ve done bufo, which is from the Sonoran Desert Toad.
On helping your Veteran brother overcome alocohol addiction
My little brother, John, he was a Marine. He was field artillery and he had a lot of trauma. And he finally told me one day, and he was against drugs. He didn’t even smoke weed. He was like, that’s just not my thing.
He came up to me one day and said he was ready to go for a spirit walk. And I set it up with Big Mike and it completely changed his life. I pulled the gun out of his mouth at one point because he had a bad alcohol problem. Not anymore. Now he just drinks recreational and has fun with it. But two words is what changed his life. I told him to go left.
I pulled the gun out of his mouth at one point because he had a bad alcohol problem. Not anymore.
In our ceremony, him and I are both Norse Pagan. He said everything to his right was just dark and cold and creepy, but everything to the left was Valhalla. It was a feast. It was everybody he loved, everybody he cared about. And I told him, go left. That’s what he needed to hear as something as simple as two words changes someone’s life.
That’s why I’m a big advocate of it. I’m down to help anybody and everybody that needs it. I always tell people, like, three or four days afterwards, you’re going to start getting these serendipity moments, where things just start connecting, and things you didn’t realize before.
A message to other veterans who are struggling
I would tell them, you’re not alone. And one of the things I’ve told people, it’s okay to not be okay. I was a scout sniper where I was told, unless you’re dying, you don’t go to sick call. If you’ve got a sore knee, you just suck it up and drive on. And that’s part of the reason why I’m 100 percent disabled through the VA now.
Because that’s what the Army, Marines, the Air Force, that’s what they condition your mind to do. And, when people think they’re alone, they’re not.
And, when people think they’re alone, they’re not.
I was always told going to sick call was a weakness. It’s not a weakness, it’s taking care of you. Because when you’re out, you’re out. The Army, the Marines, the Air Force, it doesn’t slow down.
You’re easily replaced. The Army didn’t slow down. They had someone to fill my shoes and take my spot. Maybe they were as good as me, maybe they were better, maybe they were worse. But they didn’t slow down.
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Michael Manion, a retired first sergeant and founder of Healing Frontline Heroes Mexico, shares his transformative experiences with psychedelics, particularly mushrooms and bufo which helped him overcome post-military trauma and suicidal tendencies.
Inspired by his profound healing, Michael relocated to Arizona, connected with the Seri Comcaac Nation in Mexico and delved deeper into psychedelic therapies. Michael advocates for indigenous knowledge and highlights the importance of thorough medical screening and integration support for participants. Finally, his organization plans to expand into 30-day residential programs to offer a comprehensive healing process tailored to individual needs.
Watch: US Army Veteran heals suicidal tendenices with traditional Medicine deep in Mexico
https://youtu.be/9yLvTSOnZSY
Michael leaves the military
I am a 22 year army veteran, retired first sergeant and founder and director of Healing Frontline Heroes Mexico. Five years after the military, I was damn near 300 pounds and drinking and emotionally disconnected from myself, from my family and everything around me, just lacking purpose and suicidal.
Five years after the military, I was damn near 300 pounds and drinking and emotionally disconnected from myself, from my family and everything around me, just lacking purpose and suicidal.
My military service I ended up doing a total of 22 years. I retired in 2013. I was a combination of active duty and reserve deployment time that I spent in the military. When I left the military, it was a few years later that all of those things, just started really crashing down on me.
And I eventually found my way to plant medicine. I relocated from Atlanta, Georgia out to Arizona and I met some people that the Rollin Locos Motorcycle Club and the guys in that club are all the majority of them are combat vets and they’ve all found the the road to healing through the psychedelics.
At that point in my life, I would have tried anything to make me just feel better, just feel connected to something or back to myself. And these guys started talking about psychedelics and things like that. And I had no point of reference for it. I felt that was just stuff that a bunch of crazy people did, a bunch of hippies and whatever else.
Michael’s first psychedelic experience
The very first ceremony that I ever did was mushrooms. And that mushroom journey led into a bufo journey the next morning facilitated by a guy up in Phoenix, good guys can doing great work up there.
And that was my point of introduction to the medicine. That very first ceremony. It was just every emotional aspect of my life and it brought it all to a place where I could understand it. I could see it and I could feel it. It wasn’t easy. I cried all night, and plenty more nights after that one.
But it was the ability to feel those emotions and process them in a way that I never had that allowed me to know that it showed me that, Hey man, everything’s going to be okay. You just have to lean into some of that pain because right on the other side of it is the true joy that you’re here to experience.
You just have to lean into some of that pain because right on the other side of it is the true joy that you’re here to experience.
That deep, dark place is absolutely where you find your answers. You have to lean into that darkness to be able to find the abundance and the joy and the happiness and everything that’s right on the other side of it.
On the Veteran Suicide Crisis
If we’re being honest about it, the majority of the people who joined the military are fighting forces made up of a lot of people who, when they leave home, they’re running away from something.I was a recruiter at one time too. So I understand exactly why people do these things.
But again sometimes we leave home with a bag full of stuff over this shoulder that’s unaddressed and never touched. And then you run off, you think you’re going to run away from something, but what you’re running to is going to give you a bag full of shit that’s 20 times worse than what’s already in this one.
And then when you’re done with it all, there’s nobody there to help you unpack either one of those bags. And when you decide you want some help, if you can make that decision because That’s driven into us the whole time that you’re there. You can’t lead troops from sick call, Sarge, right?
And when you do finally get to the point where you feel like you can ask for some help and you run down to your local VA, the help they’re going to give you is going to be a death pill cocktail that’s going to make you want to kill yourself 10 times more than you did when you started and that’s the norm.
the help the VA is going to give you is going to be a death pill cocktail that’s going to make you want to kill yourself 10 times more than you did when you started
Our veterans are out there killing themselves at a rate of 22 to 50 a day.
And we know they lie about numbers. And that’s just the veterans. The total number of people killing themselves in the United States is 500- 600 more a day
Watch: Exposing the Crisis: Veteran Suicide and the VA’s Role
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Ariel Ramos, a military veteran, shares her journey from a difficult post-deployment period. Upon leaving the military and undergoing therapy, Ariel discovered microdosing DMT through the Church of Ambrosia, which profoundly impacted her life.
She describes regaining her internal monologue, experiencing vivid meditative visions, and feeling a renewed sense of self and purpose. This journey led to a significant reduction in suicidal ideation and negativity, allowing Ariel to see and embody her true self for the first time in years.
Watch: Suicidal Veteran’s Lifesaving Transformation: Mushroom Church & Microdosing DMT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SPxi5XiOwc&t=2s
Ariel describes her health after leaving military
About a year ago I got out of the military after a decade of service. After a really difficult deployment, I ended up on a 5150 hold for suicidal ideation. And my life had really been spiraling out of control for a while. And after this hold I went through outpatient I started going through therapy and I’ve pretty much just spent the last year in a self-imposed isolation, trying to really reshape my life and come back from the depths of the hell I was living in.
Ariel finds the Church of Ambrosia
October of 2023 I decided to join the Church of Ambrosia. It’s a bit of an enigma living in Alameda and being in the military, people are like, Oh, there’s like a mushroom church or whatever. And I’d always said Oh, if I get out, I’m gonna, check that out.
I had not been anticipating like finding DMT there. I just thought it was like a mushroom church. That’s what everyone always calls it. So when I saw it there, I was like, I have to get it. I don’t know if I’ll ever have this opportunity again.
Ariel’s experience with microdosing DMT
I started micro dosing DMT probably like once every two weeks and when I say the difference that it has made in my life has been absolutely profound I don’t know if there are words to truly describe that level of profoundness.
I don’t know if there are words to truly describe that level of profoundness.
I was meditating a couple of days after my first DMT microdose and then all of a sudden I could hear my own voice in my head for the first time in years. And it was like meeting an old friend I had forgotten.
It was like meeting an old friend I had forgotten
Later that night after I was like sober and whatever I was just brushing my teeth looking in the mirror and all of a sudden it was like I recognized myself for the first time since I was like a teenager and I just started crying.
I was like you. Oh my god, like I’m here and I see who I am and I’ve become like exactly who I’m supposed to be even though it was like so hard and I can like finally find like a reason to live.
I can finally find a reason to live.
Ariel’s life after microdosing DMT
I feel like I’ve completely like stepped into a new reality. Like I’m hearing people differently. I hear them as who they truly are and not as this like lens of judgment I placed over them. It has shown me the path for my life and what I need to do.
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Nicole Foerster is a health care professional, community organizer, and policy advisor. They were a big part of policy reform in Denver around plant medicine and are a part of Decriminalize Nature Denver. In our interview with Nicole, they discuss how they used magic mushrooms for cluster headache
After trying psilocybin for the first time, I didn’t have another headache for three years. -Nicole
Watch: How can PSILOCYBIN help with Cluster Headaches? (3+ YEARS without an episode)
https://youtu.be/ySXYhqPC6zo
Summary of Nicole’s Experience with Psilocybin Mushrooms
Nicole shares their personal experience with cluster headaches, which began at age 16. After finding traditional pharmaceutical treatments only 30-40% effective, Nicole discovered online testimonies suggesting a 70% success rate with psilocybin.
Despite initial reluctance due to a conservative upbringing and anti-drug sentiments in her family, Nicole took a chance on psilocybin at age 18. This decision, supported by research from Cluster Busters, led to a significant improvement, with no headaches for three years!
What are Cluster Headaches?
Nicole: Cluster headaches are often called suicide headaches because one in five people with them eventually try to commit suicide, and I’m part of that statistic. Three or four months out of the year, I was having them really severely.
After trying psilocybin for the first time, I didn’t have another headache for three years.
After trying psilocybin for the first time, I didn’t have another headache for three years.
Why did you decide to try psilocybin?
I personally came to use these medicines because I was diagnosed with cluster headaches when I was 16 years old and found that there was a lot of information online about people healing themselves with psilocybin.
A lot of the research shows that the pharmaceutical options to treat cluster headaches are only about 30 to 40% effective.
And anecdotal evidence shows that psilocybin and other psychedelics have about a 70% success rate and completely putting the disorder into remission.
Anecdotal evidence shows that psilocybin and other psychedelics have about a 70% success rate and completely putting the disorder into remission.
So it’s been personally transformative for me. I was looking online for really anything. Cluster headaches are often called suicide headaches because one in five people with them eventually try to commit suicide and I’m part of that statistic.
And I was really just looking online for anything I could find.
I was 16 years old and had never even smoked weed. I grew up in the South where alcohol abuse was really prevalent and had, or came from a family that was really anti drug. And so it was very like had a lot of stigma built up around anything illegal.
But found that this was really my only option for gaining control of my life back.
When I was 18, I tried psilocybin for the first time after reading a lot of people’s just personal testimonies online through an organization called Cluster Busters that had put together a lot of the first research on psilocybin.
How Often were you having cluster headaches?
When I was 18, I had these headaches at points daily but mostly maybe three or four months out of the year, I was having them really severely.
And after trying psilocybin for the first time, I didn’t have another headache for three years.
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Deidra, a nurse from Santa Cruz, shares her experiences with psilocybin mushrooms which she began using three months ago after a friend’s recommendation.
Initially skeptical, Deidra found that the mushrooms allowed her to uncover deep-seated psychological issues that traditional therapy couldn’t access. She recounts a significant trip where suppressed childhood memories of witnessing animal suffering surfaced and were processed emotionally. Deidra believes that psychedelics have profoundly impacted her mental health, offering insights and healing that surpassed conventional talk therapy. She advocates for the decriminalization and normalization of psychedelics, criticizing the current war on drugs and its impact on society. Deidra emphasizes the importance of trusting nature, being open to alternative healing modalities, and integrating lessons from psychedelic experiences into daily life.
Watch: ER Nurse’s Life-Changing Experience with Psilocybin Mushrooms (Deidra’s testimonial)
I’m very new to psychedelics. About three months ago, I had a friend recommend psilocybin mushrooms to me, and so I did go up to Zide Door Church and become a member and got Loving Teacher mushrooms for my first experience, and I had some really good experiences.
I had happy, lighthearted, incredible experiences the first couple of times I used mushrooms. But it amazed me. I had a mushroom experience where in the three or four hours that I was on that trip, I had things come out that I didn’t realize were bothering me. I’ve been to a lot of therapy in my life and at different times.
I’m a nurse, so I’m aware of the medical world and mental health and that sort of thing. What the mushrooms brought out had never come out in my therapy sessions with anyone.
What the mushrooms brought out had never come out in my therapy sessions with anyone.
Deidra’s mushroom journey
They showed me that when I was little, I was with my dad who was a veterinarian. And from the time I was an infant until I was an adult, I was with him all the time. I was with him as his clinic. I helped him a lot. And I witnessed a lot and I didn’t forget any of these memories.
The mushrooms showed me these memories were bothering me and that I had experienced as a very young child, witnessing a lot of suffering and pain of animals, and I didn’t know what to do with it. Yeah, so really I had no idea. like frozen that in my subconscious. I think frozen it in my psyche. It was as if it was all there. I still had all the memories.
So in that time, I just saw myself as that little child witnessing lots of things happen to animals at my dad’s hands. Just things that they do in medicine and in farming. Things in documentaries, de-horning, lots of different types of veterinary medicine. I witnessed all of it and the animals not getting anesthesia and they’re in pain.
And I’m very empathetic and very sensitive to energy and always have been and I’m just standing there watching this from the time I was tiny.
The mushrooms helped me access things that were almost locked up in the basement of my psyche or the attic of my psyche that I didn’t even know were there, didn’t even know were bothering me.
One of the biggest changes I’ve seen since that trip is I don’t wanna die anymore. I had a whole year where I really just didn’t want to live, and not that I was.
One of the biggest changes I’ve seen since that trip is I don’t wanna die anymore.
As an ER nurse, what would you share with others about psychedelics?
I’ve been front lines helping people in mental health crisis and we throw a lot of medications at them. We sedate them, we restrain them chemically and physically and then we put them on drugs.
They keep having to go back to that don’t necessarily help. So I would love for this to be completely legalized and normalized everywhere. It’s plants. It’s plants.
I would love for it to just be accessible to everyone. And not gate kept. And not illegal.
I’m really angry at our American system and the whole war on drugs. It’s really been a war on people. It’s mostly a war on people of color and certain communities.
I’m really angry at our American system and the whole war on drugs.
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Adrienne Smith, a yoga studio owner and former triathlete, shares her transformative experiences with psychedelics. She delves into how her perspective on life and relationships changed after rowing across the Pacific Ocean and subsequent experiences with psilocybin and MDMA. She focuses on how psychedelics helped her rediscover marriage and improve the overall environment of her household.
Adrienne discusses the impact of psychedelics on her marriage, personal growth, and the importance of normalizing these substances for mental and emotional healing. She highlights the significance of creating intentional downtime, feeling emotions deeply, and how these practices have enhanced her connection with herself and others. Adrienne advocates for the responsible use of psychedelics.
Adrienne is the owner of Power Of Your Om Yoga studio in Santa Barbara, California.
Normalizing psychedelics is important because we’re having conversations about so many other things and methods of healing and this one should be included. If something that occurs in nature can help, in my opinion, heal our entire planet. Why aren’t we using it? -Adrienne
Watch: Triathlete Shares How MDMA Revived Her Marriage
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4nCDu5uaps&t=43s
There is no amount of therapy that could have got us to this point. All the walls, the years of resentment, like, just issues and problems and disconnection that was present just dropped in an instant
Describe your first MDMA experience?
We cleared our schedule. My daughter was with my sister and we took some MDMA and went to the beach. And it was fascinating because it took quite a while to feel anything. And I was like, is anything happening?
And we’re laying there and my head’s up like the side of the ocean. My feet are facing shore where my husband and I are kind of facing each other. And he’s sitting in this chair and I asked him, I had my hand on my heart and I’m just laying there. We’re listening to music. And I said, how are you feeling?
And he’s like, nothing. I knew this would happen. And I said to him, I go, well, interestingly, I said, I’ve never seen you sit still for so long. And, classically people think of MDMA as like dance vibes. I had no expectations, really didn’t really do any research. I just trusted my friend.
And 10 minutes later, we’re laying down next to each other. And I said to him. There is no amount of therapy that could have got us to this point. All the walls, the years of resentment, like, just issues and problems and disconnection that was present just dropped in an instant and I mean, we had gone to therapists.
We were trying everything, but we couldn’t let go of stuff that was in the way. So no matter what kind of talk therapy or tools or skills or books that we were reading just like didn’t get through to us, like actually. feeling.
If I look back now, it’s like I felt whole and complete at that moment. And there was nothing else that I needed to do in order to feel that way. Like it was already present. And then he simultaneously having the same personal experience. And then we’re experiencing that together. And that was just the beginning of a completely new relationship, like what I now term is like, this is the real us.
that was just the beginning of a completely new relationship, like what I now term is, this is the real us.
The other way that we operate is just, When we get into our default patterns of operating so what started to shift from that day was the ability to go back and connect to each other to connect to that moment. And that’s just shifted the whole entire tone and energy of our house, even when I’m helping my daughter put her clothes on for school and I’m starting to get feeling having that feeling of, I don’t have enough time. She’s going to be late. We’re rushing. I’m able to really quickly and I know these are certain skills that we can learn just in a meditation practice and a yoga practice where you take a deep breath.
But there’s like an innate feeling that is remembered in the body, I can tap into instantly because of the experiences that I’ve had on psychedelics
Its just shifted the whole entire tone and energy of our house
How have psychedelics helped you as an athlete?
They’ve helped me feel my feelings and I’ve been an athlete since I was four. I’m 44 now, never in my wildest dreams thought that this would be a conversation that I would be having. Even one year ago today, I never could have even forecasted being interviewed for a normalizing psychedelics interview.
I did triathlon for a long time and I kept signing up for races. Because it was just what I was used to it was what I was good at and it’s what I got acknowledged for. The ego felt so good about that.
When I stopped doing it because I was like, I don’t like it anymore But I don’t have anything else to fill the space I started to realize that in a way just existing and giving myself this downtime has allowed me to see like, oh my god I like music.
I love dancing. I like going to concerts. I don’t even know how this came to be something that I practiced, but I would take a 500 milligrams or a gram of mushrooms and I would go on a walk just outside of my house, take maybe like 45 minutes to an hour, and then I would come home, I’d put in headphones, and I’d turn on a sound healing.
I would lay on my floor and just feel. And that would be the time of like the most intense sensory experience. Sound was louder. I could feel my body more. I would always put something over my eyes because I always noticed that during that time I do want to go internal and feel what’s happening.
Then all of a sudden, I just gave myself intentional downtime, different from watching movies and Netflix and scrolling on Instagram downtime. I like to call that, like, creative time. And, and then all of a sudden, that creation of space gives me ideas later. Like, the next day, I’m listening to people differently.
I’m able to listen. I think truly being able to identify that I’m feeling a physical sensation that I can then tie to feeling overwhelmed. So it’s like, oh, I’m feeling a tightness in my chest or my stomach is all weird.
And I can check and be like, yeah, I am feeling a little overwhelmed and overworked and irritated. And then as a result, I can look at my schedule for what I have to do over the course of a day and then prioritize what’s actually important today that I have to get done.
Watch: Triathlete on Psilocybin “It helped me FEEL my feelings”
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Your donation will help us publish more personal stories involving psychedelics to transform public opinion, reduce stigmas, and redefine wellness. It can also help self lives.
Welcome to Normalize Psychedelics. We’re building a community that celebrates transformation through authentic medicine work. 🌱 While psychedelic healing is often associated with mental health, our community members are discovering breakthroughs across all aspects of life—from healing relationships to breaking free from addiction to finding authenticity at any age. Through these real stories, we’re creating a world where psychedelic healing is understood and accessible to all.
Meet Johnny Arellano, a Seattle-area cabinet finisher whose transformation story caught our attention in late 2022. Through intentional psychedelic experiences, Johnny transformed his life at age 44—dropping from 225 to 190 lbs, embracing 3 AM yoga and meditation, and deepening his marriage. His journey shows how conscious medicine work can catalyze profound change across physical health, relationships, and spiritual growth.
Watch: From Party Life to 3AM Yoga: How Psychedelics Changed This Dad’s Life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89XD1Qmj28o&t=5s
Q&A with Johnny
How did your life change after your first LSD experience?
Johnny: My first high dose experience with LSD actually, I was in a point of my life I didn’t belong and things weren’t going right in my life and I needed to move.
This was at a point in my life where I didn’t know what I was going to do. I didn’t have any intimate relationships and just had this party crew, people who lived with me, a bunch of roommates. And I got tired of waking up, walking over people passed out sleeping while I went to work.
During this experience, I went up onto the roof and enjoyed the stars, and closed my eyes and went deep. And then the sun was rising and the clouds were pink. It was beautiful, and it was like this dragon was just going over the sunrise and telling me to go north. And my parents had moved to Washington. And I was like, all right, I’m done, I told my roommates that I’m moving out. And then I moved to Washington State.
I moved to Washington State, I found the love of my life. I started a family and didn’t really touch psychedelic drugs.
And then life went on and I had three beautiful kids, I got a house and a dog, two dogs and a cat.
How did you rediscover psychedelics later in life?
Joe Rogan had Michael Pollan on his podcast, and it was about the book “How to change your mind”. I downloaded that audiobook, listened to it and it was like… all right, so there’s something to these substances. I had a crazy experience and was like, Whoa, what the heck was that? I had no idea what exactly it was and what could it do. And then after listening to his story, I was like, I got to try this differently.
So I did. I made the intention for sober October. I was completely sober, and in October I downloaded the Calm app and picked up meditation, and I set an intention for self exploration of my consciousness (taking psychedelics). I was happy, you know, things are okay. And that experience was crazy.
It was like the Kundalini chakra colors and I was traveling through all of those.
It was just amazing.
I went through space, in the clouds, it was like the cosmos were right there in front of me.
And then a flash of light just hit me with all the love and gratitude in the world. And I was crying and the connection to everything was just so strong.
The only other experience I could ever compare to was being in the birthing room when my son was born.
And then I thought, wow, I’ve never had that. The only other experience I could ever compare to that was being in the birthing room when my son was born and I was holding my wife’s legs up and I watched him come out, the whole thing. And that feeling I had in my heart. That love.
That’s the only thing, I was there front row with you, and the nurse looks at me. She’s like, Dad, are you okay? And I was like, I am the best that I’ve ever been. I understand why men will hit the ground, and that’s the only thing you can compare it to.
I’m getting chills just thinking of the experiences.
It was life changing.
I was like, you know, there’s so much more to life and I want to be the best person I can be. And that put me on the path to becoming the best version of myself.
I changed my diet. I continued with the meditation. You know, yoga, exercise daily. It just kind of put me on the path to be a better person. And then I told myself, this is something I want to do on a yearly basis.
How have psychedelics changed your marriage?
My wife, she wasn’t really into soliciting mushrooms. I think she’s had lower doses. So she had an experience where she’s like, I don’t want to do that, but now that I’m doing this, she’s like, Maybe I’ll try since we’re doing this more responsibly.
But we were in some rocky times in our relationship and typical things, you know, it’s difficult in relationships. There’s give and take and there was things that I wasn’t doing. And she wanted me to do. And we had a hard time communicating with that. And it got to the point where she couldn’t really express herself and she got frustrated and she wasn’t happy, so she felt like she wanted to leave.
I was devastated.
She’s the love of my life. I couldn’t see myself being with anybody else. And I said, you know, people do this for couples therapy, PTSD. And a coworker of mine, she had some MDMA and she sold it to me. And my wife was like, would you be interested in taking this with me and just hanging out, see what happens?
So we both took about .3 grams of MDMA and we watched Blue Planet and it was beautiful.
You know, we were like, you know, the ocean and everything. And the way that documentary, when they set you up, is so beautiful and then smack you at the end. We were just like, man, we need to be better people.
And the documentaries over, and we kind of just really start to roll. Now we’re getting into it, we’re cuddling, you know, we’re holding each other. And what it did for me is it made me shut up and listen. And what it did for her is it made her open up and talk. And we talked for 6 hours, all night long. And she was willing to say without holding anything back.
She just said everything that I did that she wasn’t happy with and I was willing to receive it, without putting up a wall and being negative to where it would be a headbutt.
It was more of the open, heart loving conversation. And we came out of that loving each other even more.
And it got to the point where I was like, you know, this is something we should do at least once a year if we can, just to reset.
