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It Was Never About the Alcohol — Meghan on Psilocybin, Addiction and Doing the Real Work

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Everyone kept treating the alcohol.
Nobody asked why she needed it.
Seven treatment centers.
Fourteen detoxes.
It wasn’t until psilocybin that she finally understood what her addiction had been trying to tell her all along.

Watch The Short Story

From Artem: When I first met Meghan over a year ago, what struck me most was not just her openness about addiction, but how deeply she understood the emotional and spiritual layers beneath it. She spoke about her life with an unusual level of honesty, intuition, and self-awareness that stayed with me long after our first conversation.

https://youtu.be/3yuj6k9KMIk

About Meghan

Meghan Bayersdorfer is a mother of three, a wife, and a yoga lover who turned her darkest chapter into her life’s mission. She now directs the McMunn Family Foundation, advocating for alternative approaches to mental health

What Meghan’s Story Explores

Addiction can be rooted in something much deeper
Meghan went to seven treatment centers and stopped at the airport bar on the way home from every one. The alcohol was never the problem — it was the solution she had found to a much deeper pain.

Struggle is not always visible
A Girl Scout leader who once faced 2 felony charges. A devoted mother who looked completely put together while barely surviving. Meghan’s story is a reminder that you never really know what someone is carrying.

Healing looked different than she expected
After years of treatment programs, detoxes, and traditional mental health approaches, Meghan describes psilocybin as one of the experiences that helped her begin confronting the deeper emotional patterns beneath her addiction.

Full Interview (1:00:00)

In Meghan’s Words

The labels of “alcoholic” and “addict” never really resonated with you. Why is that?

Meghan: It really went deeper than that. The biggest arguments I had with my dad were about willpower. He’d say, you’re so motivated, so driven — why can’t you just figure this out? And I wanted to scream, it’s not about the alcohol. I just didn’t like myself. I hated my life. I didn’t feel like I had a place here. What I was trying to find a solution to were the voices in my head that told me I wasn’t worthy, that I wasn’t capable, and that I wasn’t loved.

You’ve talked about how connection was at the root of so much of this. Can you speak to that?

Meghan: When I was 17 I actually quit drinking on my own — and everyone shunned me. My best friends turned their backs on me. And then my friend Sara died the week before graduation and we all came together and drank, and I was welcomed back in. That was the message I received: this is how you are accepted. This is how you are loved. It made me so sad to discover that. That sweet little version of me who had tried to choose a different path — and was punished for it.

What was your internal state going into your first psilocybin ceremony?

Meghan: I really didn’t care what happened. I knew that whatever the outcome was, it was going to be better than what I was living. It was a terrible experience — I swore I would never do it again. I remember thinking, oh my God, I’m stuck in this hell forever. Every inner demon came out and wanted to battle it out with me. But a couple of days later I thought, there’s something deeper that happened — and I survived. And that was enough to make me want to go back.

You Are Not Alone

If this story resonated with you, we invite you to explore more psychedelic experiences or share your own story with Normalize Psychedelics.

Explore other stories about psychedelics and addiction

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About Normalize Psychedelics​

Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit working to change public understanding of psychedelic medicine by sharing real stories of healing. Through firsthand accounts, we aim to reduce stigma and broaden the conversation around mental health and wellness.

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22 Years of Psych Drugs, Mystery Illness, and The Promise of Ibogaine || Amber Cummings & Dr. Greg Lazelle

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Full Interview with Amber Cummings & Dr. Greg Lazelle at the bottom of the page

Amber spent 22 years on psychiatric medications from age 12, eventually meeting Dr. Greg, who diagnosed her with cerebellar autoimmunity after her medication withdrawal led to debilitating symptoms. She describes her journey through medication dependence, suicide attempts, and eventual discovery that the “chemical imbalance” theory was marketing fiction rather than science. When conventional treatments proved insufficient, she underwent two ibogaine sessions, which Dr. Greg explains work by increasing neural growth factors to restore brain function.

During her ibogaine experiences, Amber confronted limiting beliefs and processed trauma through vivid visions, ultimately reprogramming deep-seated negative thought patterns. She reports significant improvements in health and energy following treatment, describing a shift from “scraping the bottom of the cup” to having a cup that’s “overflowing.” Both emphasize the difference between consciousness-reducing psychiatric drugs and consciousness-expanding psychedelics, with Amber now coaching others to reclaim their mental freedom through holistic approaches.

Connect with Amber Cummings:
Instagram – @MentalHealthRebels
Email – amber@mentalhealthrebels@gmail.com

Connect with Dr. Greg Lazelle
Instagram – @Dr.Greg.Global
Email – gregorylazelle28@gmail.com

Watch: The Untold Truth About Psych Med Withdrawal: A Doctor & Patient Perspective

Watch: Inspiring stories of transformation from depression

“I was put on psych drugs when I was young at 12 years old and spent 22 years believing that I was profoundly broken and that those substances could somehow fix me”
-Amber

Q&A: With Amber and Dr. Greg

Tell us about your early life and how you first got perscribed psych meds

Amber: I went from a place of living in deep suffering in affliction. I was put on psych drugs when I was young at 12 years old and spent 22 years believing that I was profoundly broken and that those substances could somehow fix me.

And it was after my second suicide attempt in my thirties where I was like, Hey,  I don’t think that these drugs are working. And I began exploring. Holistic techniques, and I’m somebody who now practices a lot of what I call energy work practices, meditation, breath work, chanting mantras, yoga, dance, movement, art, like ways that we can express ourselves and feel safely and move energy through our bodies and train our brains to be healthy and well, and be able to deal with big emotions.

“IThere’s currently millions of people that are on antidepressants, and if you just put the math together, that’s a lot of people walking around with these quote mystery illnesses.” – Dr. Greg

Dr. Greg, can you talk about Amber’s symptoms in relation to psychiatric meds from your perspective?

Dr. Greg: I first want to talk about the current medical consensus on antidepressant withdrawals. Within the past year, landmark articles in reputable journals have finally brought light to this silent epidemic happening all around us.

In the Journal of Addictive Behavior, they studied over a thousand participants and found that 80% of people who had withdrawal symptoms experienced them for over two years, and they were severe and debilitating. Another study in The Lancet showed that one in three people who have taken antidepressants will experience withdrawal symptoms. This is staggering. There are millions of people on antidepressants, and that’s a lot of people walking around with these “mystery illnesses.”

As for Amber, she came in presenting with chronic viral infections and other symptoms consistent with what these studies are showing.

Can you talk about Ibogaine and healing the brain?

Dr. Greg: When it comes to healing the brain, there are no real home runs. The interesting thing about Iboga is that the molecule is extremely complex, allowing it to work on many different pathways in the brain and body – a kind of jack of all trades function.

In the brain, we have glial cells that look like little Pac-Men, clearing out inflammatory debris and ensuring pathways fire properly. With conditions like TBI or long-term psych med use, these cells lose function, creating more inflammation. To heal the brain, you need to elevate BDNF (Brain-derived neurotrophic factor) and GDNF (Glial-derived neurotrophic factor). While diet and exercise can help, Amber couldn’t even walk without crashing. Ibogaine exponentially increases GDNF in the brain, which is why it’s so effective.

What’s fascinating is that ibogaine increases dopamine and serotonin levels (which are chronically depressed in people taking antidepressants) while simultaneously blocking the pathways that cause people to “check out” when confronting difficult emotions. This allows you to focus on your shadows while preventing the usual response of numbing out. It also helps restore misfolded proteins in receptor pathways damaged by long-term psych drug use, ensuring these pathways start working again and creating new ones in the process.

Watch the full interview with Amber Cummings and Dr. Greg Lazelle​

About Normalize Psychedelics​

Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit 501(c)(3) working to transform public perception of psychedelic medicine through real stories of healing. Our mission is to collect 1,000 powerful testimonials from individuals whose lives have been transformed by psychedelic experiences. By sharing these authentic voices, we aim to reduce stigma, advance the conversation around mental health, and expand our understanding of wellness.

Your donation will help us amplify these important stories and create lasting change. Every contribution, whether $5 or $500, directly supports our work to document and share these transformative experiences. As a registered 501(c)(3), all donations are tax-deductible. Join us in building a future where psychedelic healing is better understood and accepted

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The Alone Covid 19 will refrain from providing advice about the tax or other treatment of gifts and will encourage donors to seek guidance from their own professional advisers to assist them in the process of making their donation.

The Alone Covid 19 will accept donations of cash or publicly traded securities. Gifts of in-kind services will be accepted at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19.

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The Alone Covid 19 will respect the intent of the donor relating to gifts for restricted purposes and those relating to the desire to remain anonymous. With respect to anonymous gifts, the Alone Covid 19 will restrict information about the donor to only those staff members with a need to know.

The Alone Covid 19 will not compensate, whether through commissions, finders’ fees, or other means, any third party for directing a gift or a donor to the Alone Covid 19.

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Lessons from 15 Years Running the Ayahuasca Foundation || Carlos Tanner

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Full Interview with Carlos Tanner at the bottom of the page

Watch: Other inspiring stories of transformation from veterans

Carlos Tanner’s journey from drug addiction to founding the Ayahuasca Foundation is a testament to the transformative power of plant medicine. After struggling with depression and substance abuse in his youth, a near-death experience in 2003 led him to the Amazon rainforest, where his first ayahuasca ceremony, though challenging, set him on a new path. With no prior preparation and still actively using drugs, that initial ceremony was intense – involving multiple purges and emotional breakdowns. However, it taught him a crucial lesson about how fear shapes our experiences, leading to a breakthrough in his second ceremony when he approached it without fear.

Watch: Why I Quit Marijuana After Ayahuasca Showed Me The Truth

https://youtu.be/0kmFd7THwbs?si=JNzyTXCR9cHM7ZWy

Watch: Inspiring stories of transformation from addiction

“Ayahuasca and all healing really, but especially ayahuasca, is love medicine. It’s medicine that allows us to release the things that prevent us from loving ourselves and from radiating love out into the world around us.”
-Carlos

Read: The Spirit of Healing – Lessons from 15 Years Running the Ayahuasca Foundation

The Ayahuasca Foundation, established in 2009, emerged from Tanner’s desire to make these healing experiences more accessible to others. Located near Iquitos, Peru, the center operates in a national reserve, providing a comfortable yet authentic setting for transformation. Working closely with a respected Shipibo family of healers, whose traditions span thousands of years, Tanner bridges the gap between Western and indigenous approaches to healing. Their collaboration exemplifies what he calls the “eagle and condor prophecy” – the harmonious meeting of modern and traditional wisdom.

The healing itself is something divinely programmed into all living beings. Unfortunately, obstacles do get in the way… What we can do to facilitate that healing is the removal or cleansing of those obstacles.
-Carlos

Recent research at the foundation, conducted with Onaya Science, has shown remarkable results, particularly in treating PTSD in veterans. A study of 28 veterans showed 100% resolution of PTSD symptoms at 3-6 month follow-ups, leading to expanded research including gut biome analysis, genetic studies, and brain wave monitoring.

The center has gained wider recognition through various documentaries, including features on Netflix’s “Down to Earth with Zac Efron” and the upcoming series “The Edit.” Prior to that, the documentaries that were filmed at the center  were “The Ayahuasca Diaries” and “La Pequeña Muerte”

Tanner speaks of ayahuasca as “love medicine” that helps remove obstacles preventing natural healing – whether they’re emotional traumas, fears, or cultural conditioning. His perspective is deeply informed by both his personal healing journey and years of witnessing transformations in others. Through the foundation’s work, he advocates for normalizing psychedelic healing by removing stigma and reconnecting with ancestral wisdom, viewing consciousness expansion as a fundamental human right and healing tool.

Can you talk about the studies you’re currently facilitating at your facility in Peru?

Carlos: We’ve now had five groups come down through The Heroic Hearts Project, and the first three provided 28 veterans in total that received treatment for PTSD… after the treatment of those 28 veterans, we do three month and six month follow ups, none of them have PTSD anymore. And so 100 percent of the veterans that came down in the pilot study… were cured.

What have you learned from the Shipibo tribe that goes beyond the medicine?

Carlos: They believe that the non material elements are actually the core. Your spirit is the core of who you are, and the physical elements are the by product of the non material… We might say, ‘I have a spirit’ and they might say, ‘you are a spirit, you have a body.'”

What happened over time with your addiction as you continue your journey with ayahuasca?

Carlos: When I got into the ayahuasca ceremonies… I was able to see the root causes of why I felt bad… And when I resolved those, then I didn’t need a drug to feel better. Now I felt better as a result of removing things that had prevented me from feeling how I should, which was to love myself.

Watch the full interview with Carlos Tanner!

https://vimeo.com/1055700440?share=copy#t=0

Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to Carlos Tanner and the Ayahuasca Foundation
01:14 Carlos’ Early Life and Introduction to Psychedelics
03:52 First Ayahuasca Experience and Overcoming Addiction
12:01 Insights on End of Life Care
16:00 Founding the Ayahuasca Foundation
19:17 Sharing Ayahuasca with Family
25:24 Cultural Insights from the Shipibo Tribe
31:54 Research and Documentaries at the Ayahuasca Foundation
38:38 The Importance of Normalizing Psychedelics

About Normalize Psychedelics​

Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit 501(c)(3) working to transform public perception of psychedelic medicine through real stories of healing. Our mission is to collect 1,000 powerful testimonials from individuals whose lives have been transformed by psychedelic experiences. By sharing these authentic voices, we aim to reduce stigma, advance the conversation around mental health, and expand our understanding of wellness.

Your donation will help us amplify these important stories and create lasting change. Every contribution, whether $5 or $500, directly supports our work to document and share these transformative experiences. As a registered 501(c)(3), all donations are tax-deductible. Join us in building a future where psychedelic healing is better understood and accepted

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Your donation will help us publish more personal stories involving psychedelics to transform public opinion, reduce stigmas, and redefine wellness. It can also help self lives.
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No irrevocable gift, whether outright or life-income in character, will be accepted if under any reasonable set of circumstances the gift would jeopardize the donor’s financial security.

The Alone Covid 19 will refrain from providing advice about the tax or other treatment of gifts and will encourage donors to seek guidance from their own professional advisers to assist them in the process of making their donation.

The Alone Covid 19 will accept donations of cash or publicly traded securities. Gifts of in-kind services will be accepted at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19.

Certain other gifts, real property, personal property, in-kind gifts, non-liquid securities, and contributions whose sources are not transparent or whose use is restricted in some manner, must be reviewed prior to acceptance due to the special obligations raised or liabilities they may pose for Alone Covid 19.

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The Alone Covid 19 will respect the intent of the donor relating to gifts for restricted purposes and those relating to the desire to remain anonymous. With respect to anonymous gifts, the Alone Covid 19 will restrict information about the donor to only those staff members with a need to know.

The Alone Covid 19 will not compensate, whether through commissions, finders’ fees, or other means, any third party for directing a gift or a donor to the Alone Covid 19.

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After 21 Years of Traditional Sobriety, I Lost 40 Pounds Through Plant Medicine || Joe V

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Watch: Other Inspiring Stories of Recovering from Addiction

Joe Valenzuela is a 61-year-old lifestyle and wellness advocate who grew up in Los Angeles. His life story includes multiple chapters of addiction and recovery, having been in 12-step programs five different times totaling over 21 years of sobriety. Despite these periods of sobriety, he never felt he achieved the complete peace and freedom promised by the programs.

Watch: Five Attempts at Sobriety: What Finally Worked for Me

https://youtu.be/o-i1OzsAU5s?si=d7f6289KJ8v7v6-7

Watch: Other Inspiring Stories of Recovering from Addiction

 I got to see myself in a whole different way, and it shifted my consciousness about everything I either put into my body. I’ve been able to lose 40 pounds, transform my body, be in some of the best shape I’ve been in my life,  and that’s at 61 years old.
-Joe V

Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit 501c3 on a mission to gather 1,000 powerful healing testimonials involving psychedelics to transform public opinion, reduce stigmas, and redefine wellness.

Read: After 21 Years of Traditional Sobriety, I Lost 40 Pounds Through Plant Medicine

After reading Michael Pollan’s work and exploring alternative healing methods including breathwork and plant medicine, Joe began a personal transformation. Using a combination of breathwork, psilocybin microdosing, and cannabis, he lost 40 pounds and achieved what he considers his best physical condition at age 61.

An avid skier with 45 years of experience, Joe also enjoys mountain biking and beach volleyball. He’s found that microdosing certain substances helps him ski pain-free and recapture the feeling of his younger years. While embracing these alternative approaches to wellness, he remains mindful of his addictive personality and maintains a disciplined approach, ensuring that roughly 95% of what he puts in his body serves his health and well-being.

Through his experiences, Joe has developed a lifestyle brand focused on adventure, health, and well-being called Santa Cruz Fun Guy

“My body tells me what to do intuitively. So I feel really lucky that I’m connected”

Q&A with Joe

What is your history with 12-step recovery programs?

Joe: I have a very sort of unusual story for people in 12-step recovery in that I’ve been in it 5 different times for a total of over 21 years being completely clean and sober. The longest period was 10 years and 3 months, which ended in 2018. While I remain an open-minded person, it never felt like the end all for me – I never got to what they call happy, joyous and free.”

What sparked your willingness to try plant medicine in a conscious way?

Joe: I read a book by Michael Pollan. It resonated with me because anytime I had done psychedelics in college, it was always a love connection with nature, with humans, with animals.

Through breathwork and seeing a psychedelic therapist, I came to see myself where I am today. From that point, with microdosing as support, specifically psilocybin and cannabis, I’ve been able to lose 40 pounds, transform my body, and be in some of the best shape I’ve been in my life at 61 years old.

How do you balance your current wellness practices with your history of addiction?

I always keep in mind that I have an addictive personality, so that never leaves my forefront, whether I’m at Burning Man, a festival, a barbecue.

I’m not putting things in my body that aren’t going to serve me about 95 percent of the time. I’ve still got 5 percent to work on, but I’m okay with that for today.”

About Normalize Psychedelics​

Normalize Psychedelics is a nonprofit 501(c)(3) working to transform public perception of psychedelic medicine through real stories of healing. Our mission is to collect 1,000 powerful testimonials from individuals whose lives have been transformed by psychedelic experiences. By sharing these authentic voices, we aim to reduce stigma, advance the conversation around mental health, and expand our understanding of wellness.

Your donation will help us amplify these important stories and create lasting change. Every contribution, whether $5 or $500, directly supports our work to document and share these transformative experiences. As a registered 501(c)(3), all donations are tax-deductible. Join us in building a future where psychedelic healing is better understood and accepted

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Your donation will help us publish more personal stories involving psychedelics to transform public opinion, reduce stigmas, and redefine wellness. It can also help self lives.
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Acceptance of any contribution, gift or grant is at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19. The Alone Covid 19 will not accept any gift unless it can be used or expended consistently with the purpose and mission of the Alone Covid 19.

No irrevocable gift, whether outright or life-income in character, will be accepted if under any reasonable set of circumstances the gift would jeopardize the donor’s financial security.

The Alone Covid 19 will refrain from providing advice about the tax or other treatment of gifts and will encourage donors to seek guidance from their own professional advisers to assist them in the process of making their donation.

The Alone Covid 19 will accept donations of cash or publicly traded securities. Gifts of in-kind services will be accepted at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19.

Certain other gifts, real property, personal property, in-kind gifts, non-liquid securities, and contributions whose sources are not transparent or whose use is restricted in some manner, must be reviewed prior to acceptance due to the special obligations raised or liabilities they may pose for Alone Covid 19.

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The Alone Covid 19 will respect the intent of the donor relating to gifts for restricted purposes and those relating to the desire to remain anonymous. With respect to anonymous gifts, the Alone Covid 19 will restrict information about the donor to only those staff members with a need to know.

The Alone Covid 19 will not compensate, whether through commissions, finders’ fees, or other means, any third party for directing a gift or a donor to the Alone Covid 19.

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Injured Soldier’s Path: From Pain Pill Addiction To Rediscovering Himself With Psychedelics || Jonathan Lopez

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Summary of Jonathan’s story

Jonathan Lopez, a United States Army veteran, shares his personal story of overcoming physical and emotional trauma. After sustaining severe injuries, including the loss of his arm and traumatic brain injury, Jonathan struggled with addiction to pain medication and even attempted suicide. Rediscovering purpose through his involvement with the veteran community, he later found profound healing in a transformative psychedelic retreat using ayahuasca. This experience helped him forgive himself and others, enhancing his relationships and leading him to provide support to his peers.  Jonathan continues his journey by working with Healing Frontline Heroes and connecting with indigenous tribes to promote holistic and tribal medicine, while advocating for the importance of integration and peer support. 

I was able to forgive myself, forgive other ones and just be able to live free
-Jonathan Lopez

Watch: Injujured Soldier’s Path: From Pain Pill Addiction to Rediscovering Himself With Psychedelics

Tell us about your experience leaving the military and finding psychedelics

Jonathan:
My name is Jonathan Lopez. I’m a United States Army Veteran, and I’m also the Outdoor Programs Coordinator and Peer Support Specialist for Healing Frontline Heroes. I had a pretty good life growing up. I was very loved by my grandmother. I left home early. Joined the military at 17, went down the pipelines, infantry school, airborne training, graduate indoctrination program, all the way through special forces selection.

Unfortunately I was injured while I was stationed in Germany, and fell without a purpose for a while.  I’ve never really been into drugs, like it’s not my thing, and  all of a sudden,  I  started taking a large amount of pain medication. 

I lost my arm, had multiple injuries to my left leg, traumatic brain injury.

I was involved in a really bad accident, and  I just wanted to mask the pain to be able to get back up again.  now I know that actually the pain wasn’t as much physical as it was emotional. But, nonetheless, I,  became addicted to pain pills. It was, took me down a very, dark spiral.

A few years later ended up in a suicide attempt.  

After that,  I became very involved, once again, with the military, our veteran community. I  started  doing a lot of obstacle course races to help  endurance races, ran a skydive program for veterans

When 2020 hit, There were no more activities.  And we were losing people left and right. And I lost someone that was really, close to me.

I knew there was something that needed to be done.  I heard of psychedelics.  A good friend had offered  me a spot in a retreat for ayahuasca. Never heard that word before.

Jonathan’s First Ayahuasca Experience

A friend’s invitation to an ayahuasca retreat sparked curiosity, despite initial skepticism. Jonathan’s first experience with ayahuasca opened doors he had long kept locked, allowing him to confront and release deep-seated guilt and pain. This experience led to a profound sense of forgiveness towards himself and others, including his father and late former partner.

What changes did Jonathan make after the ayahuasca experience

Jonathan emphasizes the importance of integration post-retreat. For him, this meant mending his strained relationship with his father and reconnecting with his children’s maternal family. He realized that healing is not just a personal journey but involves restoring broken connections.

Make a Donation

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Acceptance of any contribution, gift or grant is at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19. The Alone Covid 19 will not accept any gift unless it can be used or expended consistently with the purpose and mission of the Alone Covid 19.

No irrevocable gift, whether outright or life-income in character, will be accepted if under any reasonable set of circumstances the gift would jeopardize the donor’s financial security.

The Alone Covid 19 will refrain from providing advice about the tax or other treatment of gifts and will encourage donors to seek guidance from their own professional advisers to assist them in the process of making their donation.

The Alone Covid 19 will accept donations of cash or publicly traded securities. Gifts of in-kind services will be accepted at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19.

Certain other gifts, real property, personal property, in-kind gifts, non-liquid securities, and contributions whose sources are not transparent or whose use is restricted in some manner, must be reviewed prior to acceptance due to the special obligations raised or liabilities they may pose for Alone Covid 19.

The Alone Covid 19 will provide acknowledgments to donors meeting tax requirements for property received by the charity as a gift. However, except for gifts of cash and publicly traded securities, no value shall be ascribed to any receipt or other form of substantiation of a gift received by Alone Covid 19.

The Alone Covid 19 will respect the intent of the donor relating to gifts for restricted purposes and those relating to the desire to remain anonymous. With respect to anonymous gifts, the Alone Covid 19 will restrict information about the donor to only those staff members with a need to know.

The Alone Covid 19 will not compensate, whether through commissions, finders’ fees, or other means, any third party for directing a gift or a donor to the Alone Covid 19.

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Navy Veteran’s Journey With Alcoholism and Psychedelic Healing || Gringo

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Gringo, a 53-year-old Navy veteran, shares his transformative journey with psychedelics, particularly Bufo and ayahuasca, which helped him overcome years of depression, alcoholism, and suicidal tendencies. Introduced to psychedelics by his motorcycle club president, Gringo describes the profound impact of these substances in addressing his mental health challenges. He emphasizes the importance of community support and encourages others struggling with similar issues to explore alternative healing methods. Through his experiences, Gringo champions the potential benefits of psychedelics despite societal skepticism.

What was life like before psychedelics?

My name is Gringo. I’m a 20 year Navy vet. while I was in the Navy, I served on a nuclear powered submarines, retired in 2009. after I retired in 2009, I went into the federal government until I was medically retired two years ago.

I was meant to retire because of a, botched neck surgery and it gave me a little bit of a C5 palsy and I’ve lost a lot of, strength in my, arm right here. So I am no longer, working anymore. Before psychedelics, I lived in a dark place. It was, I was very, dark. It was, I alienated myself from people.

I drank a lot. I self medicated. I would look in the mirror. I didn’t like what I saw. I ended up drinking myself till I liked what I saw. And then when I liked what I saw, I had drank too much. By the time the rest of it caught up, I was pissed off that I was going through this.

I had a lot of suicidal ideations.

I was ready to check out.

How did you find psychedelics?

I found psychedelics through the president of our motorcycle club. He came down to Mexico, down in Cabo one time and he did some ayahuasca. he kept trying to sell it to me, but after you’ve been through the, the mental health program and the VA, it’s hard to think anything helps.

But he convinced me and I went down to Hermosillo and we did, it was an awakening. It wasn’t stuff that I wanted to see, but it was stuff that I needed to see. It changed because it made me aware. I was really scared afterwards. I did a lot of crying. Crying probably about a week every day. I didn’t know how to process it very well because there was a lot of stuff that I couldn’t run from.

I couldn’t run from once I was under the medicine. I couldn’t run from it and it brought to light where my issues were and I’ve never seen anything like that. It left me scared. It left me happy. It’s just, it was just a weird feeling.

How were you able to process difficult emotions?

The family I come from, it’s hard to talk about your problems because we’re under the, we’re under the thought that if you don’t talk about it, you don’t exist and you hide a lot of things. so it was really hard to talk to people, but the guys, my motorcycle club who did it with me, Chris, who has also been interviewed and my president chaos, we all went through it together.

So it was very easy. for me to talk to them because we have all experienced it. It was, it’s not like talking to some doctor or somebody on the street where nobody knows your experience. But the guys who were there with me and we went through it, it was easy for me to ask questions and do the experience with them and have them help me guide me through.

I think the community is very important because people are going through things for different reasons, but you always need support. And one thing that I found in this community is the support everybody, even if you’ve never met somebody and you go through a ceremony, when you come back, it’s like, they’re part of the family, the connection is there.

And it’s somebody who you can express yourself to, and you can talk to, and the stuff that you couldn’t talk to people before you could talk to them because you’ve experienced the connection. You’ve got the connection, you got the bond.

Speak on the stigma surrounding psychedelics

People talk what they don’t understand. You got a lot of people who are the old guard, and they don’t want to believe in this, but this medicine’s been around for thousands of years. It’s not like it just came out of a pharmacy. this has been around. People have used it. Native Americans, Native people to whatever country they’re from, they have their own brand of medicine, spiritual medicine.

People need to try it before they say anything or they make judgment. A lot of people, if you remember last year, they made fun of Aaron Rogers for doing his ayahuasca ceremony. And people were talking around it’s a joke.

And I knew exactly what he was doing, and people want to get run in their mouth and they don’t know what to do. So I was very encouraged by that. We need more people to speak up just to the naysayers because there’s a lot of people who do this medicine.

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Psychedelics Helped Veteran Ditch 16 Medications || Chris Leisinger

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Chris Leisinger, a retired army vet and former scout sniper, shares his profound journey of healing from PTSD with the help of psychedelics after 12 years of service and three tours in Iraq. He explains how traditional medications from the VA left him emotionally numb and suicidal until an encounter with psychedelics, facilitated by his motorcycle club, changed his life. Psychedelics helped veteran ditch 16 medications and Chris is here to share his story.

We signed up to defend our country writing a check to include our life. And the VA they just want to throw pharmaceutical meds at you and it makes you emotionally numb.

-Chris

Summary

Chris now collaborates with Mike Manion and Healing Frontline Warriors, helping other veterans through ceremonies in Mexico where they provide free psychedelic treatments. Chris describes personal experiences and transformations and emphasizes the importance of reaching out for help, underscoring that it’s okay not to be okay.

 

Watch: How Psychedelics Helped a Veteran STOP Depending On Pills

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFK2h3PeIT0

 

What condition were you in after leaving the military?

My name is Chris Leisinger. I’m a retired army vet of 12 years. I was a scout sniper for those 12 years. I did 3.5 years in Iraq. 16 different psych meds from the VA, as a matter of fact. 6 of them were to treat the PTSD. The other 10 were to treat the side effects of that.

I was on 16 different psych meds from the VA. 6 of them were to treat the PTSD. The other 10 were to treat the side effects of that.

Life before psychedelics was rough. I was emotionally numb. I didn’t care about anything. I actually tried to kill myself once. And my 230 pound Mastiff Repo stopped me from doing it. And when I say stop me, I had the gun in my lap. He picked it up, carried it to the back fence, dropped it in the dirt, and then sat on it.

And then when I reached to grab it, he growled and snapped at me and then coward like I was going to beat him. That was my big, aha, wake up moment through my motorcycle club, Roland Locos. That’s what got me into the psychedelics. And it changed my life. It helped rewire my brain. So that I’m off all the meds.

I can actually enjoy life again. I’m not angry. I’m actually probably one of the calmest individuals there is. It used to, I didn’t go to Walmart unless it was like three or four in the morning. Cause if you bumped into me, I’m ripping your head off because I was just so uneasy. I was so agitated, so angry.

How many ceremonies have you been a part of?

I’ve done 16 to 20 different ceremonies to the point now. I can actually help facilitate and help other people. I can dive into people’s psyche and help them clear the cobwebs. Or as I like to say, wake up from the matrix.

I’ve done mushrooms, I’ve done ayahuasca, I’ve done bufo, which is from the Sonoran Desert Toad.

I’ve done mushrooms, I’ve done ayahuasca, I’ve done bufo, which is from the Sonoran Desert Toad.

On helping your Veteran brother overcome alocohol addiction

My little brother, John, he was a Marine. He was field artillery and he had a lot of trauma. And he finally told me one day, and he was against drugs. He didn’t even smoke weed. He was like, that’s just not my thing.

He came up to me one day and said he was ready to go for a spirit walk. And I set it up with Big Mike and it completely changed his life. I pulled the gun out of his mouth at one point because he had a bad alcohol problem. Not anymore. Now he just drinks recreational and has fun with it. But two words is what changed his life. I told him to go left.

I pulled the gun out of his mouth at one point because he had a bad alcohol problem. Not anymore.

In our ceremony, him and I are both Norse Pagan. He said everything to his right was just dark and cold and creepy, but everything to the left was Valhalla. It was a feast. It was everybody he loved, everybody he cared about. And I told him, go left. That’s what he needed to hear as something as simple as two words changes someone’s life.

That’s why I’m a big advocate of it. I’m down to help anybody and everybody that needs it. I always tell people, like, three or four days afterwards, you’re going to start getting these serendipity moments, where things just start connecting, and things you didn’t realize before.

A message to other veterans who are struggling

I would tell them, you’re not alone. And one of the things I’ve told people, it’s okay to not be okay. I was a scout sniper where I was told, unless you’re dying, you don’t go to sick call. If you’ve got a sore knee, you just suck it up and drive on. And that’s part of the reason why I’m 100 percent disabled through the VA now.

Because that’s what the Army, Marines, the Air Force, that’s what they condition your mind to do. And, when people think they’re alone, they’re not.

And, when people think they’re alone, they’re not.

I was always told going to sick call was a weakness. It’s not a weakness, it’s taking care of you. Because when you’re out, you’re out. The Army, the Marines, the Air Force, it doesn’t slow down.

You’re easily replaced. The Army didn’t slow down. They had someone to fill my shoes and take my spot. Maybe they were as good as me, maybe they were better, maybe they were worse. But they didn’t slow down.

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Sam on Normalize Psychedelics

I recovered from Opiate Addiction with DMT || Sam Fullerton

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Welcome to Normalize Psychedelics. We’re building a community that celebrates transformation through authentic medicine work. 🌱 While psychedelic healing is often associated with mental health, our community members are discovering breakthroughs across all aspects of life—from healing relationships to breaking free from addiction to finding authenticity at any age. Dive into our collection of transformation stories and discover how intentional psychedelic experiences are helping people become the best versions of themselves.

I literally watched my addiction exit my body. I came back, and I knew something was different.

Meet Sam Fullterton

Sam Fullerton, originally from Pittsburgh, shares his journey of recovering from a severe opiate addiction. Consuming up to 700 milligrams of oxycodone daily, Sam struggled immensely with withdrawals. At a crucial point, he decided to try DMT, an intense psychedelic substance. Through repeated use, he experienced profound, transformative revelations and visualizations that led to an unexpected and miraculous shift in his addiction. Despite subsequent physical injuries, which required temporary opiate use, Sam found himself free from addiction’s grip, attributing his recovery to his mystical DMT experiences.

Watch: Inspiring stories of transformation from addiction

https://youtu.be/Sn-0_xv60pk?si=NyQgXr_C7Bpcly92

Sam describes his withdrawals from Opiate Addiction

I ran out of pills at that festival. I took a small piece of Suboxone, drove home. And just knew that I couldn’t buy them anymore. Three days passed and I was going cold turkey. And cold turkey off of 700 milligrams of oxycodone is atrocious.

Pain, phantom pain, sleeplessness nausea, diarrhea, you name it. The sweats, everything that you could possibly imagine was going on. Everything in my body ached. Every cell in my body ached. I was about to lose my house. And I was falling off. There was no question. That was like the most stressful experience that I’ve ever had to go through.

And I’m going through withdrawals and there’s no question in my mind, I am going to fall off, ready to buy some pills.

Sam’s Experience with DMT during opiate addiction withdrawals

And the light just went off in my head. I said, grab that DMT. Something has to happen. I don’t know what it is, but something has to happen right now, or I’m in a bad place.

So I grabbed it and I started Just loading up the pipe, it was really magical the first time I hit it. It was this feeling It just started Overwhelming me and I had to take off my shoes because I needed to feel everything, you know so I went out onto the street and I could feel the concrete and then I walked into the mulch and I could into the grass and I could just feel Everything touching me and and just it was just this magical feeling that Couldn’t explain.

And, I did this for about two hours. DMT trips, for anyone who might not know, are probably, typically, seven to twelve minutes long. So I just continued and continued and for the most part it was colors, it was shapes and designs, and it was things that my mind and your mind, no one’s mind, can even begin to imagine until you’ve actually been through it.

Probably two hours in I looked up at the television and DJ Shadow, What Does Your Soul Look was on. And I said, you know what, that’s a very good question, and I packed it up and I hit it one more time. And this was the first time that I really felt anything close to a breakthrough, when I hit it, this voice came out of me, and it asked, in this sense, It was almost a demonic kind of a voice, something I can never mimic, but it just said, What does your soul look like, Samuel?

I remember finding myself head between my knees, squeezing, clenching my jaws, clenching my eyes, and there’s this, infinite mandala just swirling in every different direction and inside of all of the spaces you had buddhas and ganeshas probably other deities but those are the ones that i can remember and recognize at that point and i and i had no, at that point, real background in, in Hindu or Buddhism or anything

But there they were. And they were basically beckoning me, calling me, telling me come to us and be absolved of everything that’s inside you, let it go. And so I went towards them. And when I got to them, they showed me what my soul actually looked like, and my soul was black. It was tar. And We stayed there for what felt like an eternity.

And then all of a sudden, there was this eruption of color that just burst from the bottom of me and out the top of my head. And I literally watched my addiction exit my body. I came back, and I knew something was different.

I literally watched my addiction exit my body. I came back, and I knew something was different.

After that, I went through a withdrawal for four months. Two months after that, I was still going through the minor portions of it.

I never had another craving. Never.

From that time of watching my addiction leave my body, until those were gone, I’ve never had another craving.

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YouTube-Medhani-Full-interview

Inner City Trauma, Addiction & Microdosing || Medhani Vaughn

Medhani Vaughn is a social justice activist who works with “fringe folks” – this includes addicts, recovering alcoholics, and folks from trauma backgrounds. Medhani grew up in the inner city and became “cross addicted to many substances” before deciding to choose sobriety.

Meet Medhani Vaughn

Medhani Vaughn is a social justice activist who works with “fringe folks” – this includes addicts, recovering alcoholics, and folks from trauma backgrounds. Medhani grew up in the inner city and became “cross addicted to many substances” before deciding to choose sobriety. In our interview Medhani covers healing inner city trauma from the root cause, redefining addiction, and what type of role plant medicine has played in his life.

Watch “Healing Inner City Trauma – Plant medicine can help address core wounds”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFmP8vdwBYM

Can you talk about how plant medicine helped heal your addiction?

I’ve had such an experience with chemicals, both legal and illegal I was very cross addicted.

There was not a single drug that I considered my drug of choice and my dependency. It started out as recreational and experimental. I mixed all the substances and became a heavier use addict with the harder stuff.

Even after years of being sober there were still some issues that were deeper.

You can also read about this:  Psychedelics In Our Prisons || Kevin

Even after tons of ceremonial journeys and spiritual journeys and real deep therapy, EMDR, hypnotherapy, I still couldn’t pull the veil off of those things and get a clear lens on, on how it was I wanted to choose my life path.

I work in the body modification industry. And so I feel very kind of attuned to a lot of ancient things. it became very clear to me that I needed some ancient medicine and some things that came from non traditional places.

When I first chose to administer plant medicine to myself, it came from a place of, of very high respect for their origin and their real purpose.

It was all from a healing element and it has all been on a micro, not a macro scale.

How does microdosing plant medicine help you with impulse control?

I’ve been a person that always thought spontaneity as a survival mechanism, being unpredictable, is kind of an asset. You can just move a little different.

As I grew as an addict impulse became a thing, just feeding that compulsion and just acting fast. I noticed my whole life, just because of my own disorders and trauma and the way ‘m built that I’ve always kind of been out of step with things.

To sync up for me took some, some slowing down at some times and speeding up at other times.

And so to create a different pace, I think microdosing has definitely given me the ability to know when impulses are irregular.

I think impulse is good in certain situations. But sometimes that can be misfiring where a person is just impulsive all the time. And I kind of equate it to driving, right?

I’ve been in a car with someone that, that drives and they’re always on the gas, always on the gas, and they’re always moving. Proactive on pumping the brake, hitting the gas, pumping the brake.

And, you know, sometimes in driving, you’re not doing any of that. You’re not even really steering. You’re just kind of coasting, letting the car do the work and work under its own momentum. And so I’ve kind of learned to do that same thing with my impulses too.

Watch “Overcoming Addiction – Microdosing helps me with impulse control”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmgUmrNnnm0

How can plant medicine help us heal our communities?

I think the biggest obstacle that we have is all the stigma with how hallucinogenics can be healing and, and how there’s a lack of advocacy, information, education, and outreach in our society here in the United States.

I feel like because of, of the drug war and because of the economy here in the United States. And you know, even with the turn towards some areas with decrim and legalization you know, capitalism still has a huge role. It has the ability to take hold of it and still turn it into big pharma.

I actually was speaking with a friend from Brazil last night and on a recent trip, she was like, I haven’t been back in five years and everyone there is doing mushrooms and I really actually enjoy going there now. All of my friends used to do cocaine and now it’s a totally different culture.

You can also read about this:  Psychedelics Helped Triathlete In Her 40s Rediscover Marriage 

And she said, it’s very widespread there. Everywhere you go, everyone’s openly exchanging, gifting, ingesting together. And none of it is from a party vibe. It’s from a healing vibe. It’s from a community vibe.

Here in the United States, you know, it’s just hopeful that one day we can unify in in that realm and be able to do more outreach and see that the healing is there.

I feel like there’s just been so much harm done with the way our government has withheld plant medicine as a resource for the people. Plant medicine has always been helpful to indigenous cultures.

Watch the full interview with Medhani

https://vimeo.com/916964843

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David shares his story with Normalize Psychedelics

Opiate Addiction, Grieving Loss, & Psychedelics || David Rogers

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Meet David Rogers

David is a mushroom farmer, an activist for Decriminalization in Port Angeles, and the organizer of the Olympic Peninsula Fungi Festival.

Watch “Opiate Addiction, Grieving Loss, & Psychedelics”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbJFTqxUUpk

Tell us about your personal story with plant medicine?

I’ve had multiple experiences with the psychedelics that have really motivated me to get more involved. I went through multiple years of opiate addiction and was really in a deep struggle where I didn’t feel I had really any self-worth. And I’d gotten to the point where I was telling my family that I didn’t know if there was more for me, if that was my story.

And I remember just a very powerful psychedelic experience where not only I felt this extreme love and worth and that there was more for me, but also I had this moment of just, just kind of feeling like I was wasting my life away. And you know that every day I was just stuck in the same routine and it was just happening over and over and over again.

And that (psychedelic) experience really launched me towards sobriety.

And I think psychedelics could have really helped me speed that process up. But unfortunately, getting involved with a lot of treatment facilities and stuff like that, now they really push away from any use of anything and that includes entheogenic plants.

So, you know, I really kind of buried the use of those and didn’t didn’t use them to help, which I think made that more of a struggle getting to that point of sobriety.

But once I finally was able to get there, I have been probably clean for about four years and unfortunately had a family member that passed away due to opiate addiction. And so at that point I really felt this calling towards psychedelics again and psilocybin specifically. So I went on a mushroom journey in nature because nature always seemed to be very special to her.

And during that experience, I felt this really heavy fog rolling around me and I sat down and felt like it was her presence. And it just gave me time to really cry and communicate with her and it was extremely powerful. And even though the passing of my sister still hurt, it really helped with that healing process.

Even though the passing of my sister still hurt, it really helped with that healing process.

And so since then, it’s really launched me to get more involved with psychedelic societies and organizations that are helping veterans with PTSD and other things.

Can decriminalization help heal a community?

Yes, I think in many different ways. So many people have struggled many times. I’ve heard now that my whole adult life I’ve been on a mix of antidepressants and, you know, multiple at the same time. And this is the first time in my life that I haven’t been taking them.

And I feel better than I have ever. I mean, that’s extremely healing for our community.

Just the happiness that psychedelics can spread, the love the psychedelics can spread. We should all be more loving to one another. And so I think all of that is really critical in healing our communities.

Just the happiness that psychedelics can spread, the love the psychedelics can spread. We should all be more loving to one another.

Has plant medicine really helped you in your relationship?

I feel like plant medicines helped me in all my relationships. I mean, whether that be from microdosing. You know, when I microdose, I feel like I can be much more understanding and less likely to get irritated or agitated by something. You know, I can take a step back and take a breath and kind of reevaluate things.

You know, the heavy trips can be very resetting and helping you kind of really get back to a grounded space. And then also just kind of light trips that are in between. You know, there’s times that me and my wife where I’ve been the one on a light dose, but we’re laughing and crying together because that energy spreads and is infectious and, you know, playing on the ground with my my child can be very special, you know, on those in those light experiences.

And so I think it can be powerful for all relationships.

For someone who’s in a really deep, dark space and there’s just no light at the end of the tunnel from where they stand, what do you have to say to those people?

It’s sometimes hard to see, but there’s people out there that can love you. And sometimes it’s just trying to find that space where you can feel that love, you know, because you are worth being love so just try and find that community.

Watch the full interview with David

https://vimeo.com/870842638

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No irrevocable gift, whether outright or life-income in character, will be accepted if under any reasonable set of circumstances the gift would jeopardize the donor’s financial security.

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The Alone Covid 19 will accept donations of cash or publicly traded securities. Gifts of in-kind services will be accepted at the discretion of the Alone Covid 19.

Certain other gifts, real property, personal property, in-kind gifts, non-liquid securities, and contributions whose sources are not transparent or whose use is restricted in some manner, must be reviewed prior to acceptance due to the special obligations raised or liabilities they may pose for Alone Covid 19.

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